The last two points were more than fair. I have been slacking off in a few ways. Something inside me was broken with respect to work, and I couldn't get motivated until yesterday. Before the meeting with my boss, actually. I won't bore you with the details, and not just because I don't have all of them. I also have a tendency to fall asleep in meetings with more than four or five people despite my fiercest efforts. I just can't help it. I try and try and try. It's like chronic flatulence. Everyone notices it, and it's embarassing. But it's the first two points that I really take issue with.

First of all, I was brought into the meeting thinking that I was to talk about some of our campaigns, clients and so on. This is what I was told an hour beforehand. So I was blindsided with this formal shitgiving session. I knew that I was in shit as soon as she closed the door, because these meetings are always open-door. She starts making these accusations about me, and I can barely respond. I was largely silent for much of the meeting as a result. By the time I got myself together enough to say anything intelligent in my defense, she had to run off to a meeting with investors.

There were "many complaints" that I had an unprofessional attitude with clients on the phone. That I would even use inappropriate language. I wasn't respectful. I categorically and emphatically denied this. At the time I had absolutely no clue what this was about. Much to her credit, my boss immediately dismissed those charges, since she has no idea what these people were talking about, and she can't imagine me doing these things. There are exactly two things I can imagine that could put me in hot water.

1. The Dick incident. This was not intentional on my part. After I got off the phone, everyone around me starting laughing. They had to clue me in. I certainly didn't say anything inappropriate, and if Brigitte thought so, then it's probably because she is sensitive to people making fun of that silly name, and assumed that I had done the same.
2. The rum lady. Someone called in from a major rum manufacturer in Kingston, Jamaica and we chatted about our mutual love of rum. A perfectly appropriate thing to do when you are trying to make a prospect feel comfortable with you. I won't get into the details of this, but I am extremely confident that we would not be as far in the sales cycle as we are if it weren't for me and the way I developed a professional and personal relationship with the woman. We joked, we talked about rum, Jamaica and St. Vincent.

The second charge, the thing that truly burns my ass, is the accusation that I am a lecherous asshole. More specifically, the charge that I "made inappropriate comments to female employees". When asked about what these comments were, I wasn't given an answer. She didn't even bother to make up something, or...anything. SHE DIDN'T RESPOND. Now if someone comes to you with complaints "from many people", doesn't it make sense that they tell you what you did or said? Even vaguely? If they are committed to having this behaviour corrected, doesn't it make sense that they tell you something?

Instead, I had to guess. My guess seems to have been correct, although I can't be sure. I gave compliments on appearance. That's my sin. And it wasn't how it was delivered. It was the fact that I did it more than once in the last six months.