At 3:30, everyone gathered in the training room, the only room big enough for everyone. The CEO started:

At the beginning of this year, we knew that we were going to have expenses of X per month. We had investors kick in to offset some of those expenses. Our commercial sales are not closing as fast as we wanted them to close. Also, the big huge deal with the army isn't closing now. It will close, but we don't know when. It could be in 30 days, or it could be in 90 days. We don't know. But as of now, we are spending twice as much as we are bringing in, so we have to reduce spending. There WILL be layoffs. Effective immediately. Some of you have just lost your jobs. Now is not the time for questions. On each of your desks is an envelope telling you where to go to receive instructions.

There was some other stuff that was said, but I can't remember it. I looked around. I knew that I was one of the unlucky ones, what with the stuff that had been happening lately, but I was wondering about the others. Our receptionist, Isabelle, was crying openly. She as going into the same room as I was, the large conference room. She was lucky, though. Turns out that she was there by mistake.

The president, the VP Strategic Planning and the HR woman were there to "greet" us. The president and co-founder told us that he regretted being the bearer of bad news, but our group was the one primarily affected. It was us.

In the room was a diverse group of people with varying experience and seniority. Every group was represented: sales, R&D, SQA, Client Services, everyone. Except management, of course. I was a little shocked when they laid off the company's first employee a while back. (Read that entry, it's funny and ironic now.) But I was not surprised when I saw Employee #2 there, the man who has brought in the most amount of sales in the history of the company. The one who brought in most of the sales this year. It didn't surprise me at all. It also didn't surprise me when Guy was in the room, father of four, including triplets under the age of three. Sophie, the hot but bitter girl. The amateur porn star. Bonnie, who returned from mat leave two months ago. Josiane, who returned from mat leave two DAYS ago. Yeo-Hoon, super family man and incredible product manager and developer. There were no surprises.

The president told us emphatically that we were not to blame. That we were simply casualties of bad timing and bad luck. He said that our priorities were to find jobs now. There is a small chance that the army deal will come through and some people will get called back, but he told us not to hold our breath. On our desks was a letter explaining severance and so on. They cut one-third of the salaries across the board.

By this time the rest of the employees were asked to leave and were off the premises. There were people stationed to help us get our things, although we had as long as we needed to to arrange for things to be picked up. We could come in next week if we wanted to. Cab chits were arranged for those without cars. It was a strange feeling, though, gathering my things in an almost empty office with coworkers "helping" me. It felt like I was wading through molasses, and some things were in slow motion. Sad, really. It was a sad experience. But I wasn't sad for myself, really. It was just a sad thing to happen. I was hoping to last until the end of the year, but that wasn't to be.

I had a brief word with my boss. She said that I was a good guy, and good at my job, and that she would be happy to provide great references when I need them. I was to schedule a meeting at the end of the month to discuss how I was diong with respect to the problems encountered earlier, and I said that I wouldn't get that chance now. She said that she would honour that meeting anyway. That was nice. Now that I am no longer an employee, maybe she'll open up to me about what I did wrong.

I took a cab through heavy traffic all the way home with my gymbag and box o' stuff. I asked the cab to wait while I dump the stuff, and then we picked up Rose. Finally we went downtown. I was to meet people there and watch the hockey game (yay Canada!). The cab ride cost $54. At least I was able to stick it to them once.

I felt upset briefly this morning, because I felt like I should have been at work. Not that I should not have been laid off in particular, but that none of this should have happened. I should be there working out a way to crack the insurance market. I should have been there.

And now? I'll relax and take this week off to do nothing. I wanted to sit and think about what I want to do next in life, but I didn't want to be force just yet. There are things I wanted to get done, but it seems as though I won't be able to. I'll have to decide if I want to get back in the rat race or do something else on my own, like everyone else seems to be doing. I'll figure something out, though. I always do sooner or later.