A coworker has this woman that babysits his kids that he calls "The Cookie Lady". She is independently wealthy and loves nothing more than to bake cookies and cakes for people, free of charge. The coworker often brings in his spoils for all of us to share. The cake looked good in the box, but when I cut it it looked like this:

It looks like the wreck of a cake freighter. Just cake everywhere. Local authorities were on the scene overseeing the carnage. Local residents were seen shoveling piles of the wreck into their fucking greedy mouths. More news at 11.

UPDATE: I am walking into more training right now. Let the hilarity ensue.